I find often one of the biggest barriers to awakening and healing is our ingrained idea of progress (that and our attachment to rational thinking). Even thinking we are on a path suggest to us that there is a defined ground to walk. Linear thinking that if I do A + B my life will lead me to C. How do you even know what C is. You may think you want C. But after a little time will you think, “Ugh, C wasn’t so good. Time to move on.”? Living life in the drivers seat can keep us in the cycle of constantly trading one set of circumstances for another.
Entering the healing force of spiritual life requires us to give up all our ideas of C. Even though there may be stages and cycles that are identifiable. We can talk to someone and quickly they can relate to what is happening with you and connect to something that has happened to them. This helps us and we need that too, to find community, a sangha to travel with on our spiritual journey. But we also have to be prepared to give up the attachment of relating to seek advice for problems and be open to recieve what is inside us already. What actually needs responding to and what is that still centre in us speaking right now.
If you are imagining a process to be a certain way then likely you are out of the moment that is happening right now. You have inadvertently put yourself back in the drivers seat. Strategizing your process to what you want to happen.
Real healing requires us to surrender all of our preconcieved notions. When we give up our expectations of how we want things to be, when we want things to be, and what things are…. then we remove ourselves from the driver seat. Then it is possible for something Bigger to guide us.
Even when everything in us is railing against what is happening.
Even when it is really uncomfortable.
Even we we are repulsed.
Even when all of our senses tell us this must not be so, there is something to be done.
It is so.
We must Trust. In that which is bigger than us. We must get out of the way for healing to happen. For Grace to descend. We must give up our knowing to be informed and guided towards BEING.
Can you think of an example of a time when you really didn’t like what was happening and then everything turned out alright without all of your involvement? Those moments are building our strong faith. To trust the process. Trust that we will be carried through. Spirit knows what we want and will bring us to it, eventually. Though, it generally doesn’t look like how we thought of it ourselves.
It will be better. Because we will have been cleansed our ideas of how we thought it will be right or wrong and open to just recieve.